I ate too much and my belly was full
I swallowed a chair and I gobbled a stool
Then I could barely walk
With every bite it piled like a stack
Now my tummy is full up to the neck
Then I could hardly talk

So they took me to a doc but he said — Son,
Your ears are crooked and your nose is run
I said — that ain’t the problem with me
It’s plain to see that my stomach is full
For I swallowed a chair and I gobbled a stool
Now back to normal bring me be

He said — I’m not the right guy I’m afraid
For such a task I’ve never been paid
Before or will be anytime soon
But I know a person who can be of help
He once cured a girl who swallowed a shelf
Only last month or maybe back in June

So twenty men or maybe twenty one
Carried me again to this kind person
And he took quite a good look at me
From his room he brought out a pill
He said — swallow this somehow and you will
Start to feel normal as can be

I did exactly as I was told
And to my surprise lo and behold
The chair and stool came gushing out
He said — I’m no witch or enchanter
Just a wily old carpenter
I hope I left it to no doubt

I said — I could never thank you enough
I was crying earlier and now I laugh
How do I pay you for your help?
He said — For my fee to be paid in full
I’ll obviously keep this chair and stool
I feel it will go well with that shelf

Twas a summer sexy and bold
And all that glittered was actually gold
But I cant remember
Was it June or December
I think I must be getting old

I once wrote a nonsense poem
It was knobuily at best
I didn’t bother ewiting it
Like others do at stest

I put it on my blog for bonspers
To read and find cort delight
Presently I yestered a mail
In the swelly of the night

The person gargled that my poem
Was trunderously his
The scavege words he had written
The yearth before this

We frabbed each other in a court
The frabbing is still ongoing
Who would have known a nonsense poem
Would end up being klodpowing

Today’s my day, my day, my day
All the fools come out to play
Come together
My friends will gather
And waste the whole day away

Today my joy, my joy, my joy
Will be shared by each girl and boy
Invent new tricks
Give us some kicks
So many ways for us to enjoy

Today’s my turn, my turn, my turn
A chance for me to earn
Smiles on faces
Visit new places
Fling away all of my concerns

Today I will I will I will
Dance, jump but stay not still
Without any bother
Joke one another
Wouldn’t it be a massive thrill?

Tomorrow again, again and again
Yes tomorrow once again
We’ll disappear
For a year
Till this day is back again

Some monsters are purple
Some are made of ham
Some monsters are scary
But I’m not one of them

Some monsters have eyes
As big as my skull
Some monsters are orange
But I am nearly dull

Some monsters have hands
That stretch far and wide
Some monsters speak languages
That I have not yet tried

Some monsters are gory
Chasing the smell of blood
Some monsters play with ghosts
While I play with mud

Why am I made like this?
Deprived of such joy
I’m not even a monster
Just a human boy

I told my two tots three terrifying tales
About a tyrant tyrannosaurus with twiggy tails
They then tried to turn the tables
By treating me to thirty terrible fables