I know this is going to sound awkward
But I cannot hold it inside me any longer
My skin, my veins, my body are urging
Me to ask you this and I can resist them no more
The question is this: am I going to die?

I know it sounds awkward coming from
A six-year old girl; but the question has been
Troubling me for quite some time; I feel
Quite relieved already getting it out of my system
But not as much as I would feel once I know

So, tell me; tell me the truth and I shall accept
It as it is; I shall not be melodramatic about
It at all; I shall feel quenched and nothing more
Haven’t you taught me that truth is important
Even if it hurts or even if it is deadly?

It actually sounds very amusing considering
That it was only as recent as the new year’s eve
That I felt as if I was going to live forever
I remember looking at the stars and whispering
To myself: why couldn’t I go on like they do?

It doesn’t look too amusing now that I am here
Lying helplessly and enervated on this bed with
Fever running through my bones; my fingers ache
As I hold on to your hand and I cannot bring
Myself to hold your hand tighter than this

This fever has suppressed my spirit and the fire
That used to burn within me; it has caused my throat to hurt with every cough I take; my head is hammered every minute as my lips go dry; the
Only thing it has not killed is my curiosity

Yes, I come back to the question again; do not
Try to let go of my grip even though it would not
Take a monumental effort for you to do so if
You so desired; I know we are all going to meet
Our fate; will I meet mine anytime soon?

What is it that sticks
to your skin and gradually
accumulates and begins
to form layers and layers of itself?
What is it that later
starts to melt and seeps
through the pores and mixes
with the blood in your veins?
What is it that then flows
to your heart to find
for itself a permanent
place of residency?
What is it that settles
in your heart and slowly
begins to take control of
your internal organs and systems?
What is it that later
dictates your mood
emotions and your state of mind?

No, it’s not love

‘What happened after I died?’
Hmmm, that’s an interesting question
Well, I found myself in heaven
And was given a home
Amongst the gods

It was pleasant, charming
And very real and also very
Unbelievably bright and
Sunny; I had the best of clothes
And the choicest food

My body felt no ache or
Pain; my bruises were healed
My skin was smooth and
Wrinkle-free and my hair
Was dark and glossy

I looked the best version
Of myself; and everyone I
Adored were there to sit
With me and chatter over
A cup of espresso coffee

Yes, I had everything that
One could ever wish for;
Despite all that there was
One flaw in it: it didn’t have
The two persons I love the most:
My husband and my daughter

Without giving it another thought
I left all of that and took on
This lifeless, ghoulish form
To come down and be with you;
for what is heaven without
The ones you love the most